Now I am sorry if the title of this article comes across as pretentions or like I am some kind of know it all. Because the fact of the matter is that I do not know everything about raising kids, far from it. But today I wanted to share a few of my thoughts, feelings, ramblings or whatever you want to call them with you guys. Being a parent is the best thing I have ever done and even on those days when the house is a mess, kids are driving me crazy and there is some kind of sticky substance all over the remote control, I still love it!
Kids Have Bad Days Too!
We all have those days when we wake up on the wrong side of the bed, we feel grumpy and just really irritable. Us, adults, just pass this off as us being tired, but when a kid is having a meltdown or they are in a bad mood we expect them to just snap out of it. Now I am not saying I let my kids away with murder, but I can tell when they are “pushing their luck” and when they are genuinely just having an off day. Think about how you feel when you are having an off day and how you want to be left alone and not harassed, your kids want that too!
A Little Time Goes Along Way
As cheesy as it sounds your kids would rather spend time with you than you spend money on them. This does not mean you need to spend 24/7 playing with them. But make it a point if you are say putting the trash out and they are shooting hoops in the backyard or whatever, to just take a minute jump in there and have some fun with them for a little while. Just a few minutes playtime, no matter what age they are, can keep that bond you have with them strong.
Sometimes You Have To Be The Bad Guy
I have a fun relationship with my kids, but that does not mean we do not have our share of disagreements. Just the other day my eldest, who is not even 10, wanted to go and play at the abandoned quarry with his friends… Unsupervised. No matter how much I tried to tell him my reasons for not letting him go and how it was not safe, to him I was just a mean adult trying to spoil his fun. If keeping him safe means that he needs to think I am “being a jerk” for a few hours, then so be it. I do have a great deal of trust in my kids, but at the end of the day if I think something sounds like a terrible idea then I am going to have to step in and say no, no matter what they may think of me.
Encourage Your Kids Hobbies
As a kid I have vivid memories of when I wanted to ditch one of my sports clubs ( I think it was hockey) so that I could join the school theatre club which was on at the same time. I was made fun of by my old man and my siblings for this. Now to be fair they were not doing this to be nasty to me. But it had a really negative effect and made me shy away from trying something that I really wanted to do. If your kids does come to you and says “hey I want to be a cheerleader”,” try out for the basketball team”,” join a dungeons & dragons club” or whatever, no matter how weird it may sound to you, support them in it and tell them to try it out.
You also might find interesting this related article: Dealing With Your Child’s Tantrums